WHAT I THINK?

As I was growing up I would often sit and listen to my mom or dad tell me what I should do or what I was going to do (if i wanted to live here under their roof), and wonder why dont you ask me what I think I should do? This moment in time has been poking its head into my now grown up life as I try to tell my soon to be 17 year old son what I now know what he needs to do. The blank look on his face when I "suggest" what he might do tells me those words that I hear in the back of my mind ("You'll see one day when you have kids") were true. I would only admit this to ...well ...me.
The thing I cant comprehend is how much the world is changing. When I was young(er)...I would have never and I mean NEVER talked with such sturness to my parents. I was too afraid that I would get grounded or at the worst end up with no teeth. Not that my parents ever threatened me with that, but I had an understanding from a very young age that respect was the upmost important thing to my parents. Anyone that knows of my past and has been here will testify that my mom...well she was sturn but I could sweet talk her out of a no. Now on the other hand ...my dad... he would say no and no more questions were asked. Also, if I asked him ..well let me rephrase that ...if I would even start to ask and his eyebrow raised in the slightest...I just turned my not so happy butt around and took it with a grain of salt and smiled. Did I ever test my dad ..well yes...did I ever do it again after that BIG mistake..NO. I learn fast.

To get to my point. I am in turmoil right now. I have a situation going on with my soon to be 17 year old son that I have ask myself what I should do. I know what I should do, but this is so hard. That goes back to another saying from the past that has followed us all to the present...a hard head makes a soft behind. I guess its time to let go of the little boy I would rock to sleep and sing lullabies to and hand him over to the world and see what kind of bed he makes for himself. I just know in my heart and mind that no matter what happens mom will be there to tuck him in.

So for the time being I will get a good seat..and watch the big screen of life pass by while all the good choices and bad choices are made. This is what life is all about choices right?

Comments

Miss Hope said…
Girl. Your Daddy scared ME. That eyebrow would go up and I just knew he was gonna whup us good.

I miss your Mama, too.
October 15, 2008 at 9:08 AM
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